I was born on the 45th anniversary of the adoption of the 19th Amendment, which gave women the right to vote. So each year when I celebrate my birthday, I am also honoring Women's Equality Day.

Being female, I guess I find that pretty darn significant!!

I was terrifyingly skinny for most of my life (as in, under 80 pounds) until a few years ago when I started this up and down thing with the scale. I weighed 97 pounds the day I delivered my first son. My highest non-pregnancy-related weight was 123 pounds.

I recently weighed myself and was shocked to find I'm back down to 94 pounds. It may be a combination of stress and the fact that I smoke too much, but I need to put some weight back on!

Don't hate me because I'm skinny - trust me, it's been my life's curse.

I used to be an extreme bitch - but I've mellowed (some) with age. I'm talking ball-busting, raving lunatic here. Chalk it up to a bad childhood that left me feeling over-defensive and hyper-vigilant about being mistreated.

I believe in UFOs and psychics and ghosts and an after-life, though I still question God's existence at times.

I still hate my ex-stepfather even though I haven't seen him face-to-face in over 20 years. If I could see him today, I have no idea what I'd say, though I'm sure it would involve cursing, spitting, and possibly a semi-automatic weapon.

My IQ, when last tested, was 140. I don't seem to make much use of it these days. When I dropped out of high school during the last six weeks of my junior year (because I was pregnant), I still ended up only a half-credit short of passing to senior. Go figure. I decided to get my GED before the rest of my class even graduated.

I never went to college, though I did attend a technical school (computer programming). I've always enjoyed learning new things, and I'll probably take some college classes one day, just as soon as I figure out what exactly I want to do with my life.

Apparently, I'm a descendant of President John Adams. Gee, whoopeeeeee. It means more to me that my great, great grandmother was a full-blooded Cherokee squaw. Maybe because that's not as far up the family tree.

Here's a bit of family folklore for you:

My oldest son had a wart on his finger many, many years ago. On a visit to my great-grandmother's (her mom was the squaw), she took out an old coin and proceeded to rub it over the wart, muttering in some undecipherable tongue.

Two days later, the wart was completely gone.

I don't like the heat or humidity, but I've lived in Texas all my life. And I'm proud of it. Especially every time we put another criminal to death.

I look forward to the day when child molestation becomes a capital offense.

I'm pro-choice, but I chickened out on having an abortion twice in my life. Thank goodness.

I've never truly been in love - though I thought I was once as a teenager (so that means I'm not sure it counts). And I wasn't in love with the man I married, although I did love him, just not the way I should have.

I'm an avid Howard Stern fan, despite the fact that some people think he's a sexist. He's not. Really, I promise. I wouldn't listen to him if I thought he was. Or hell, maybe I would, if only to find out what goes through guys' heads.

I'm a "cool mom" but a terrible disciplinarian. This applies to both my children and my animals.

I hate to go anywhere without a book or magazine available to read. I sleep with books on my bed for pretty much the same reason: I like having them nearby.

Without my contacts, I'm legally blind. When I got my first pair of glasses in seventh grade, they improved my appearance. Sad, but true.

Because I'm a perfectionist, it takes me a long time to get ready to go somewhere (makeup, hair, clothes). But once I'm done, I generally forget about it, except for the lipstick touch-up thing.

I'd like to have my belly-button pierced, but I'm deathly afraid of needles. (Being needle-phobic made pregnancy a blast!) I'm a pussy when it comes to pain of any kind. I have to ask for nitrous oxide just to get my teeth cleaned. I had my ears pierced in a state mental hospital when I was about 12, because they were able to numb the lobes. (No, I wasn't a patient, my grandmother worked there and a doctor did it as a favor to her.)

** UPDATE ** I did it!! Read all about it.

Heights make me nervous, but only exposed heights. Like when I'm watching a movie (Cliffhanger, for example). My palms and the bottoms of my feet start sweating. I've had dreams where I was at the top of a very narrow pole on a very narrow platform and it was just terrifying.

I'm not a morning person. Period.

I'm not a patient person. I tend to walk fast, talk fast, and finish other people's sentences. Which is so endearing, don't you think?

I'm a liberal conservative. Or a conservative liberal. Whichever you prefer.

I'm not athletic and I have no rhythm. I couldn't even learn the two-step, despite being married to a fantastic dancer, because I was clumsy and couldn't relax enough to let someone else lead.

I love to make people laugh. Maybe because I figure if they're laughing, they won't hit me (that hyper-vigilance again). Or maybe just because I hate silence and try to fill it up with something. Laughter is good.

When I was growing up, I wanted to be a lawyer, a detective, and a writer. I still do.

I think marijuana should be legal, just like cigarettes and alcohol. You don't have to be a pothead to be confused by hypocrisy.

I wear cheap silver jewelry. Lots of it. Including toe rings and an ankle bracelet.

I had to have my wedding rings cut off of my finger a couple of years ago because when I got married I was much skinnier, and I never, ever took the rings off, and as I put on weight, the rings were starting to leave a dent in my finger. Plus they were gold, and didn't go with my cheap silver jewelry, haha.

My favorite authors are Anne Lamott, Stephen King, and John Grisham (when he wrote "A Time to Kill"). I read lots of other authors, but these three seem to stand out the most in my mind. Another author who I think is great is Lavyrle Spencer, although I don't read her much anymore, maybe because I've become cynical about romance. Same goes for Sandra Brown.

My favorite color is black. But because it would be too scary and dull to wear that all the time, I add "real" colors now and then.

I polish my toenails in dark colors, but prefer to wear clear on my nails, which are French-manicured (and technically artificial, since I can't seem to grow my own nails as long as I used to be able to).

My not-so-secret dream is to have breast implants. When I hit puberty, I was relieved because I was sure that meant the breasts were on their way. I'm still waiting. I've only had cleavage once in my life, and I was pregnant so it didn't last. I often joke that implants will be included in my funeral arrangements, so at least I can enjoy them in the after-life.

In 1985, I was hospitalized with Hepatitis (A, I think) for a week. I thought I had Toxic Shock Syndrome and was dying (back then, TSS was all the rage). It was the most exhausting thing that I've ever run into. I was so damn tired that I lied to get out of standing up to take x-rays by saying I might be pregnant, even though I knew I was on my period.

Funny thing is, having Hepatitis got me off menthol cigarettes. Back then, you could actually smoke in a hospital, and my doctor laughed and said, 'You won't be doing that for long'. Hepatitis has this interesting side effect of making cigarettes taste like absolute shit. A few weeks later, I started smoking Marlboro Lights, and I've never smoked a menthol since.

My birthmark is this tiny little hole at the top of my left ear, right about where it meets the side of my face.

I'm a Dallas Stars fan. When the Schnauzer I bought as a Christmas gift for my mother a few years ago had puppies, I named "mine" after the Stars' goalie, Ed Belfour. But my mom keeps calling him "Belly". (My other favorite player is Derrian Hatcher, but neither name seemed to work for the dog.)

I've traveled very little (Oklahoma, Las Vegas, Phoenix) but I really want to see more of the world. Maybe someday.

I tend to talk with my hands a lot, especially if I'm nervous or feeling strong emotions. It can be very distracting to the people listening, and I always mean to sit on my hands, but I forget most of the time.

I failed my first driving test - for speeding. And failure to keep my hands at 10 and 2. Ironically, I made these mistakes because I was too distracted thinking about when I'd have to parallel park and failing that part of the test!

I learned my lesson and passed on the second attempt.

I got my first ticket before I ever even had the license - for driving in violation of my learner's permit. I think I've had about - let's see if I can count them - six (?) tickets since then. All for speeding (once in excess of 90mph while eight months pregnant). I try to keep a better eye on that now. But, God, I do love the rush of driving fast!

I have a concealed carry permit. (Hey, it's TEXAS!!!)

I'd never fired a real gun until the qualifying test, and I still scored 241 out of a possible 250. It would have been 246, but as a novice, I overcompensated on the final distance by pulling up the gun too high and one shot went over the target's shoulder. (The paper dummy's shoulder, not a real person's shoulder!)

The instructor credited my score to the fact that I'm a woman, and women tend to have better aim. Nice to know that's an advantage when it comes to personal protection, since as a woman, I'm also more likely to be a victim in the first place.

Unfortunately, some asshole broke into my house and stole my gun, so now I have nothing to carry concealed!!

I've never had a broken bone, though that will probably change as I get older, since I'm a prime candidate for osteo-whatever the hell it is.

Even though I'm right-handed, my mouse buttons are set for a left-handed user. A couple of years ago, my wrist was really bugging me from all the computer use at work and at home, and I was afraid I was getting carpal tunnel syndrome. I switched the buttons and it made an immediate difference. Although it irritated anyone who ever tried to use my computer after that.

Eh, fuck 'em. =)