03.26.01 - reader beware - the disclaimer: If you haven't figured it out yet - this is an online journal....

03.26.01 - who's that girlie?: Biographies can be so boring unless you're an egomaniac. Then again, why do most people put journals and diaries up on the Internet if not...

03.26.01 - bits & pieces of me: I was born on the 45th anniversary of the adoption of the 19th Amendment, which gave women the right to vote. So each year when...

03.28.01 - thank you baby!: I never thanked you for the email you sent me from Nashville...you know, the one you wrote after you found out I had mailed a...

04.15.01 - depression: I have been treated for depression on and off in my life over the past 15 years. Ironic that this would coincide with the span...

04.27.01 - felony victim: Just when you think things can't get any worse - they do....

04.29.01 - uncertainty: Nothing in this life is 100% perfect and guaranteed against failure, especially when it comes to intimate relationships. It would be nice if we had...

05.05.01 - tornados: I guess we should have expected it, what with Mayfest going on all around, but last night was terrible for weather. Right around the time...

05.06.01 - xanax makes you stupid: 5:17 am - I woke up screaming and in a cold sweat. I was having a terrible dream, the dream where I was stuck at...

05.07.01 - i am the cake: Yesterday, after my early morning entry, I went back and forth between my bed, trying to sleep, and my computer, trying not to look at...

05.08.01 - uninsured motorist: It's amazing how things can change in your life in such a short time. Even more amazing is how you can be blissfully unaware of...

05.09.01 - silence speaks volumes: I haven't heard anything from Matt. I guess by the end of today, I'll know everything I need to know; at least, the one thing...

05.11.01 - happy parents: About a year and a half after Justin was born, The Ex and I separated for close to a year. It was at my request....

05.13.01 - life is unfair: Matt sent me an instant message on Monday wishing me a belated Happy Mother's Day....

05.15.01 - 4th grade math: I've been thinking a great deal about the comparisons between this break-up with Matt and the last one I had, with E.R. It's funny how...

05.21.01 - good monday morning: I got a nice surprise last Wednesday evening before leaving for Justin's game: Matt sent me an Enigma CD, ordered off my wish list from...

05.22.01 - online journal dangers: In reading over the past two days' entries, I realized that I need to be a little more discreet when it comes to other people....

07.01.01 - time is flying by: My new employer is a very nice man. He called and made the offer less than an hour after I left his office. And surprisingly,...

07.02.01 - i am officially middle-aged: There's nothing like your annual gynecological exam to open your eyes to the reality of your aging body. I don't look old, I don't feel...

08.04.01 - oh my aching head!: I hope I can finish this entry. I had way too much to drink last night, and I'm paying for it today. Bud came over...

08.08.01 - the break: My right hand holds matches My left holds my past I hope the wind catches And burns it down fast...

08.19.01 - toe-dipping: You know the feeling: when you want to jump into the pool, and swim in the water, but you know that at first, the water...

08.22.01 - former flames (part one): For a moment, forgive the irony of the break I took, wherein I professed to burn down the past, as I take a side trip...

08.25.01 - former flames (part two): The second former flame is Bud. That's not his real name, but when we were younger, one of our favorite movies was "Urban Cowboy", and...

08.26.01 - birthday present: Today is my 36th birthday! I don't really feel older; in fact, I feel younger and freer than I have in years. I bought myself...

09.02.01 - shopping frenzy: I was a shopping fiend this weekend!...

09.09.01 - my boring life: I'm writing this entry not because I have anything interesting to say, but merely out of a sense of obligation to my journal....

09.10.01 - angry shel: Angry Shel paid a visit today. I almost didn't recognize Her, it's been so long since She's made an appearance!...

09.11.01 - the bastards: Shock turned to grief and anger in the United States following the series of terrorist attacks Tuesday morning that destroyed four hijacked commercial airplanes, the...

09.12.01 - overload: I guess my brain was too full of the tragedy yesterday: I wrote my entry, updated the calendar and index - and completely forgot to...

09.17.01 - no safe harbor: This morning, I walked into work and came face-to-face with the reason I haven't wanted to be there the past few days....

09.19.01 - daddy? pfffft!: I don't recall any specific incident that brought us here. No screaming matches, no phone receivers slammed down in anger, no dramatic send-offs - nothing...

09.20.01 - long weekend: This has been a rough week on me, for reasons I don't completely understand, so I asked for tomorrow off as a personal day. Yippee!!!...

09.23.01 - where to begin?: I am most definitely not a happy camper at the moment....

09.24.01 - you don't know me: I'm sorry my last entry was such a downer. Thanks to those readers who sent me words of support. It's nice to know that even...

10.07.01 - am i dead yet?: I had every intention of writing an entry yesterday - honestly, I did. But I got waylaid by - of all things - a nap....

10.11.01 - d-i-v-o-r-c-e: Today I officially closed an enormous chapter in my life story - a chapter marked on either end by national tragedies....

10.14.01 - just rambling: Some days I open up the file for my entry, and I know exactly what I'm going to write about. Other days - like today...

10.16.01 - egotism: First of all, I don't have a whole heck of a lot to say today, and second, I'm tired of getting all dressed up every...

10.20.01 - work weary: I ended a long week at work by spending three hours in my car - driving to get the kids. That's how long it took...

10.24.01 - skin hunger: I was reading a book yesterday about living happily as a single woman, and one of the issues discussed was what the author defined as...

10.27.01 - war of words: It's quite amazing how you can struggle so hard to find the right way to make a single, simple request - and then find yourself...

10.28.01 - aftermath: The final bomb in the war of words was delivered last night - after he visited this journal and read yesterday's entries:...

11.13.01 - obligatory entry: I've been neglectful, I know. I wish I had some marvelous excuse for my lack of entries....

11.23.01 - uh, what day is it?: Gobble, gobble. Thanksgiving sucks when you've got a migraine....

12.26.01 - mouse poop: It all started when the Senior Bean Counter opened his bottom desk drawer around 10 a.m. this morning....

12.31.01 - endings (alone): The last day of a very old, long, tiresome year. Just like this night a year ago, I'm home alone. Hopefully, this New Year's Eve...

01.19.02 - 114 entries: Egads! I finally finished converting all of my past journal entries over into Movable Type....

02.02.02 - wanting what you cannot have: It's funny how you can not want someone until you figure out that maybe they don't want you - then suddenly your interest level changes....

02.10.02 - photo day: When I don't have a lot to say, or what I have to say really isn't worth talking about, I resort to pictures....

02.12.02 - s.a.s.s.i.t.u.d.e.: Five words that should be synonymous with your name: eclectic, impatient, smart, pragmatic, over-analyzer...

02.14.02 - dear me: Dear Me, It's Valentine's Day. I know you're not big on hearts and flowers and mushy love stuff, but there are a few things you...

02.16.02 - ten years: My mother sent me and my sister Stefani an e-mail yesterday, reminding us that it's been ten years today since Brandy died....

03.09.02 - happy hour: Pardon me while I tend to my throbbing head....

03.16.02 - bachelorette number one: It's been an interesting week, full of annoyances, tension, laughter, and impending life changes....

03.24.02 - let it go: I really don't think I've felt relaxed since the moment I realized I'll be moving soon....

03.26.02 - one year: My, how time flies when you aren't watching the clock!...

04.15.02 - plano, texas - here i am: Fifteen days since my last entry - but there's been too much going on in my head to stop and write about it!...

05.07.02 - a rhythm lost: I seem to have somehow lost my rhythm these days where my journal and blog are concerned....

05.12.02 - are you my mother?: We all know by now that being a mother is a difficult, mostly thankless task....

05.26.02 - tacos and wine: This bachelorette lifestyle isn't quite as exciting as I envisioned....

05.29.02 - the other woman?: It's an awkward position to be in - keeping secrets from a man's wife....

07.07.02 - my mo-ped: After much difficulty getting our schedules in sync - so much difficulty that I had already made other plans after already having plans to see...

07.19.02 - some kind of trouble: I have the oddest sensation these days: a sensation that I am about to be in serious trouble - the kind of trouble I haven't...

07.24.02 - head vs. heart: The Head Voice won....

08.01.02 - 100 things about me: 100 things you may or may not know about me:...

08.03.02 - of sleep, truth, and euphoria: I did not go to SueEllen's and watch lesbian dancers and get drunk and crazy with my friends last night....

08.10.02 - pass the pepto, please: Oh...my...God!!! Did I ever have fun last night! Hands down, the absolute best time I've had literally in years....

08.18.02 - men: who needs them?: Okay. So that's a pretty harsh statement, I know....

08.19.02 - a warning: subject heading: from a stalker...

08.31.02 - give me an f: When you take the "F" out of "F-B", what's left?...

09.02.02 - nightmares: go away!: After several weeks of having nothing but pleasant (and rather stimulating) dreams, this weekend has been full of bizarre nightmares....

09.15.02 - all about me: It's been a busy week - and mostly, it's been all about me, baby!...

10.06.02 - what can i say?: Hmmm. I hate those entries that start out with me not knowing what to write about....

10.27.02 - kidneys, kids, and crazy dogs: It's the end of the weekend, and I feel like I've had no weekend at all....

11.03.02 - conversations with goddess: Goddess: Girlie, I've been meaning to talk to you about this sex and love thing....

11.24.02 - the need to bleed: Okay, I'm warning you upfront - if you're a man, you probably should skip this journal entry - or at least, the first section....

12.19.02 - ho ho hoooooooo: I'm a Scrooge, I'll admit it....

01.01.03 - looking back, looking forward: Ahh, the first day of a brand new year!...

01.19.03 - she who must be obeyed: TO: All Employees FROM: Girlie's Boss DATE: 01/14/2003 RE: Promotion of Girlie...

02.09.03 - mothers and sons and fathers: Haven't done one of these in a while. I've been so busy with other things that finding time to write has been low priority. Sigh....

03.03.03 - feeling manly: The Ex always said my testosterone levels were too high....

03.16.03 - eyes wide open: I've spent a lot of time lately reading through my old journal entries, and I've noticed something rather strange and sad....

04.12.03 - identity crisis: I'm in a bit of a funk these days....

05.13.03 - dichotomy: Dichotomy: division into two usually contradictory parts...

06.22.03 - bed bug: This weekend, I've pretty much been a bed-bug....

07.20.03 - the ones you love: You want to scream You want to cry You want someone to tell you why All the hope that's in your heart Is not enough...

08.02.03 - did i mention?: Although I've come to see my life as rather mundane and therefore, unworthy of regular journal entries, I realized there are a few things that...

08.03.03 - still mentioning: My previous entry got a little long-winded, so here are some other things that have happened recently....

09.08.03 - the thrill is gone: Have you ever loved someone so intensely and for what seems like so long that you never would have believed it possible to one day...

10.06.03 - how it happens: This is how it happens....

11.09.03 - train back on track: I feel as though I should make some sort of statement now that my journal is open again....

12.15.03 - seducing a girlie: Leave funny little messages on her cel phone while she's at work (because you know she never answers it during the day)....

01.01.04 - blocked: I was surprised to see that I have about five entries in the journal that are still set on "Draft" status....

01.02.04 - puffy eye day: You know you're off to a shitty start in a new year when you're in your boss's office crying by 10 a.m. on your first...